Also, I realized I was at the logical ending of a Part 1 or Chapter 1 or whatever. So I test posted it. I'll read it from the screen and see what I think.
I did smooth over the biggest problem with this first part this morning. It had been bugging me since I wrote it. It clunked and didn't have a good context. I think all fixed now. I'll see how it feels when I read it.
Crossposted at "http://brainofck.dreamwidth.org/353755.html"